I think in a way, girls like and in fact, LOVE it when they feel loved. The way how their boyfriend will hold their hands everywhere they go, how they will say 'i love you' so many times per day, how much material gifts they buy for you during important dates etc.
But being with Nero, he isn't all about the hopeless romantic as I am and go around holding my hands everywhere we go or hug/kiss me everywhere, he doesn't say 'i love you' so much (in fact he doesn't say it everyday but only at random times), he will not buy me material gifts on important dates.
I can honestly say at one point of time, I felt really unloved. But what I came to realise was what is something even better than the romantic boyfriends out there. Nero might not be romantic, but he showed me love through actions AND words in a different way; in his own way with sincerity and everything else that not money or random sweet words could buy.
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He may not hold my hands everywhere we go, but it is during the times where it was so crowded that he will hold my hands to make sure i will not get lost or bumped into some strangers (even though if it really did happen, i will be the one who make them bounce from all the blubbers i have in my body) and during the time where he bring me in to his house to meet his parents for the first time he hold my hands.
He may not be the sweetest guy who shows me he cares about me and he definitely don't say 'i love you' as much as any romantic boyfriends will do. But he will make sure that when he do wants to say it, he will AND when he cares for me, he shows it to me through his actions. His love is not about saying i love you-s, but it is how we can walk together and he will wipe off the water off from my nose. YA, i sweat through my nose it's like cooking rice steam and he WILL, without fail at random times on every dates, wipe it when he sees it.
He may not freaking kiss me everywhere we go and go all horny on me but when we do kiss, it is by heart and by his own sincerity that can never be replaced. even if it's a peck on my cheeks and not like slither the tongue in and a make out session will occur.
He may be saying "no" to me and kept on telling me for these years "can you start eating other foods?" when i said i wanted to eat something that i am craving for. But he will never forget anything i say and bring me eat it, without spoiling me. Like once in a while, i crave for sushi and if he knows i haven't eat it for very long, he will take me to that place and let me eat sushi. But if he knows i wanter to eat chicken rice and i already had chicken rice just 2-3 days back, he will ignore me la. (although i will still get it on my own lol) which brings to another point that he may not be the one who constantly surprises me with gifts but he will just bring the things i want at important dates -although i never crave for any presents other than foods- and thats where he will take me.
He may not be the one who sugar-coats his words but even if he does, he still didn't give up on me and have never thought of giving up on me no matter how unreasonable and how crazy I became once I am jealous or insecure. Even though some times i blame myself for reacting so big over it. It's his way of saying 'he loves me' without telling me.
All these things he did for me and more.... may not be how other guys show their love to their girlfriends, but it is in fact something, i will never trade with anything. Ya, that includes my chicken rice and sushi. If one day one funny person (better not use this on me) tries to make me choose between nero and these yummy foods, i will still choose nero. And it might be a light comparison for people who don't know me well but hello, these foods mean a lot to me. They make up my life.
Anyway, It all comes from within his heart and not one time was it done by less than 100% of sincerity coming from him. I might be hopeless romantic, but it is him, being him. Dating a non-romantic guy is not even something I could complain. Because all these random things he do out of sincerity, are something special EVERY SINGLE TIME he does it. Imagine if he holds my hands everywhere we go and never let go, i will feel like it has become a normal thing and i won't feel special. Of course, I am not saying it's a bad thing if your boyfriend holds your hands everywhere you go- cause thats how he shows his love for you.
Of course, i will still be that naggy irritating girl who nags at him constantly to remind him of things and other stuffs, and I will still be the irritating girl who will sha qiao to him every single time and be the one who will complain about this that those, i will still tell him goodnight and i love him everyday at least once or more if i feel like i miss him a lot during the day and just randomly pop up say all those, and i will still be one who will gets jealous (although maintaining and also improving on my insecurities but hello it really is NOT easy like learning 123 la with a past like mine coming like this whole thing is a deja vu again because of that girl). I mean, that's how i show how much i love him and i honestly have thought about a lot of times like what if i am not sensitive, what if i don't get jealous over things like that, what if i don't give a fuck so much about him like how i am now? Then how do i let him know that i love him, if i don't do all these that i am doing.
But because we are having these opposites with each other, i can teach him how to be wilful and naggy and shaqiao also bringing out the craziness and the child in us, while he taught me how to save money, how to be angry but confront with head and not my heart (like me duh), how to work hard.... and more. Sometimes, differences are what blends in together making it works like gel.
With this, I love him even more than I can ever describe... and more feelings but i really don't know how to put it in words.
Cause I'm still going to be me writing a whole long post going in a round-about way and beat about the bush before writing the ending and straight-to-point, while he's the opposite but he still reads it anyway. Though he taught me how to talk straight-to-point but i always get frustrated cause i need DETAILS and he isn't giving it to me. It's like if he is in the army, I can tell him i did this and that and give him details like today i woke up at this timing and then i crave for something then i eat that and then how i change my mind and never eat that all those.. aiya all the details la. But then he can just come and tell me he today did this training and never include the feelings like how he felt all those la or like need to shit all those, cause i see long messages i happy what. hahahahahahahahaha but aiya, used to it already la cause i will pester him to get a slightly long answer than the last one then i over the moon already lol. Same way, like how i can text long long stuffs then suddenly if i reply one word he will think there is something wrong with me and starts to get worried.
HEHE AWWW THESE KINDS OF THINGS~~~~~~
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