Reminiscing

As the days get nearer to 15 nov, and I finally logged in to insta account after like 7 weeks of Mia there, I really miss Travelling. 

It's an excitement to go with families but with friends, it's another whole new level of experience.... Like eating 5 meals per day, getting fat together, living with each other's way style of living, how they sleep etc. and I guess, going to travel with my cow will be a whole new lot of feelings. 

I love exploring these kinds. I really think it's been the time where we can really sit down and have a nice chat in a normal way... Or drunk way when I'm with the usuals. 

Honestly missing everything of it. I wish I could travel more with them hehe. 

Anyway. I've been soooo busy lately. Making new website for my new store, liar games drama, business as usual, learning korean, learning psychology....

Need a getaway badly and I'm stoked. Cause 15th is finally coming!!! Will be overseas w my boy until 17th and also celebrating our 2yrs3months tgt on the 15th!! 

Happy nehhhhhhh～～～～

Domino effect

This is gonna be long because I have sooooo many thoughts in my brain right now I just think that all the things I'm thinking bout will sound blabberish cause I'm like a train track whatever I am thinking i just write it down without filtering. But it's okay. Who cares about grammars and vocabs and what's not when in the end the only one who matters is me re reading it the next time. 

People say I stubborn. Even my own family and Nero can't stand it and just gets frustrated with me sometimes. But it doesn't matter.

Why? Because the decisions I made are wise and good. And so far, I've never regretted anything I've decided. This "wise" thinking and stubbornness started during sec 5 and still on-Going. 

But I don't hate it. Because with that, I am able to escape plenty of troubles that I could have been in, i could have disappointed many people I care, I would have cared about people I shouldn't care about, I would have not grown independently and still ask money from my parents, I could have not learned how to make websites on my own that people could probably take course or paid for.... Etc.

More and more of that but they say people change and I honestly changed a lot. But better. Independent. Stubborn to the bone. K say all this like saying my good sides right but whatever it is ALL true. *flips hair* talk about hair. I regretted cutting my fringe back to bangs. Only thing I regretted is always eating too much and anyhow cut hair when I feel like it. Aishhhhhh.

Back to topic. I actually have a lot to talk about but then so many things on my mind I talked about two things, I forgot about the other stuffs I wanna talk about. So I shall end here and blog again when I remember. 

AH. I remembered something else. 

My bro and I. Sometimes there's a certain topic we have to avoid because he's stubborn, I am stubborn. So I can't be bothered to talk to him about it. Talk one time can make a mountain out of a mole. 

He thinks that people who clubs and smokes aren't bad and I shouldn't loathe them. I DONT AH. I don't hate people who do that. I tell him sooooo many times already. I just don't like the environment, not the people. I mean YA la, friend friend U go there then go la not my problem as long as they enjoy themselves. But don't and never ever ever force me to go there. (And actually I'm quite happy that I made the right friends la. They went la but If I don't go I don't have to and they don't force me like put a knife on my throat and say if I don't then don't friend this kinda thing la. I think mutual respect and understanding is good). But then on the other hand, BEsides talking about friends. If I'm choosing a partner I have to spend my life with, i don't think I will want to have someone like that. Once is enough. Lesson learnt, case closed. Never repeat the same mistakes. No AH. Don't anyone dare to tell me once a mistake from one guy doesn't mean all like that WHAt. Bull my shit. How many people have I actually met that had their relationship broken due to that. ALOT MORE THAN YOU THINK. And no AH. Don't say cause they choose wrong partner. I will refuse and reject that shit excuse. Anyway. Like I said. I don't hate the people, I dislike the environment. The environment as well as the consequences people have to bear. They lose their ability to judge what's right and wrong under the wrong influence, and the responsibility is too big. The hurt given to the other partner who didn't do any wrong is just too over powering. 

So to prevent that shit from happening. I shut those shit down from my life. My smoking is eating food and my clubbing is shopping. Don't say waste money AH alcohol and ciggs I bet cost more. And don't say eat eat eat become fat pig. I rather have food to eat and gain calories there than to drink and gain calories through liquid.

Say so much later some smartass will tell me "The previous crush U had on someone Also smoke and club what". YA LA THATS WHY I END UP DISLIKING IT MORE THAN I LIKE IT, I HATED IT, AND I NEVER END UP W HIM RIGHT.

Although I don't believe in God all these things AH. But sometimes my mouth more poisoning than my actions la. So sometimes if my business is good, I go to my house altar and say thanks. I don't ask for it to have more la but say thanks at least I grateful la. And to have met Nero and such. I think my love life is damn fucking LUcky cause I only have to suffer through heartbreaks once for 4 years. but all is good and although I don't tell anyone before but I really still thank him the above thanks la. I don't ask for anything from him above, I just say thanks. So I just think... I'm not that bad after all. Since I'm like ALready blessed by it and go through the communion and the ladt stage of it that die die make me catholic but dk laaaaaa. I don't Even know ANYTHJNF about the bible and holy holy things. 

I don't want think ALRADY so tired and sleepy. My mood these days really like roller coaster come out of nowhere one. I think my Ang coming soon. BURDEN. 

Oh oh oh!!! And it's already the 20++. I'm looking forward to the 15th of next month. Heheheheheheehhehehehehehehehe ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Liar game

My friends would probably know no matter how they psycho me, if a drama or a show is not romance or don't have any romance part of it I WONT WATCH. 

YA I've been searching high and lows for all these kind of NORMAL romance shows and tbh, I think these few months I've tried lot of funny funny shows. 

I used to only watch kdrama and Taiwan dramas. Mostly kdrama la but after that devil beside you show I couldn't find any other shows that are that good. So I gave up on Taiwan drama and move on w kdrama. It's been really really really good but I just got tired of finding for a new good romance kdrama. So I went back to Taiwanese drama and I found two freaking good shows!!! But I forgot one of the name but I know got Aaron Yan inside. Then now I'm watching fabulous boys. A remake la but it's still as good.

I went on searching for anime and there's this anime I went craaaaaazy over. KAICHOU wa maid Sama. Wah good stuff man that one. The main lead love love love love. 

Kk back to the main topic. What I wanted to say was. I watched this jap drama called "liar games". It isn't about love. But it's very addictive cause it's just about intellectual and psychology shit that's FTEAKING good. Like cmon AH. In a room of 22 people, how would you guarantee from either a yes or a no answer that you can be part of the lesser people grp and a guaranteed victory, if it was a minority challenge. I won't even call it smart it's just genius. Or maybe I stupid with maths and psychology la but it's really damn interesting. Got a lot more  challenges it's intriguing man.

Okay don't want blog already GONNA watch the next episode HEHEEHEHE. 

Right now

Right now,
I am supposed to be asleep already because every time i eat beef, I will be very very very very sleepy after that. And I ate beef earlier on. Ribeye extra cut at Astons'.

With my boy. We went to eat at the salad and bar thing Aston's buffet. Ya again. And this time, we both ordered the same thing. Actually we wanted to go for the normal prime ribeye cut at $21+ (with buffet and free flow drink) 200gm of the beef. BUT THIS SMART MAN OF MINE. Saw the $24++ 250gm of ribeye extra cut and he said "wah add $$ amount only slight difference we go for extra cut la" SO OKAY. OH OH OH and i tell you!!! I damn happy cause ah. Like you know the closer you are with your partner the similar you become right??????? Thennnnnn ~~~~~

Nero said to the waiter " 2 of extra ribeye cut"
Waiter: would you like to get the fries or baked potato for the side dishes?
ME & NERO AT THE SAME TIME "Baked potato"
Waiter: how would you like it done?
ME & NERO AT THE SAME TIME "Medium rare"
Waiter: would you like mushroom sauce or black pepper sauce?
ME & NERO AT THE SAME TIME "Mushroom"

YOU TELL ME HOW HAPPY I WAS. LOL. Okay, maybe you think it's exaggerating on the part of my happiness but honestly, I WAS THAT FUCKING OVER THE MOON OKAY. LOL.

Anddddd, If you know me well enough, you know i FUCKING LOVE the mushroom soup at Astons' cause of the very strong herb and mushroom smell, and the creaminess. AND TODAY's SOUP of the day was that. HAPPY MEEEEEEE~~~~!!!

After we ate until so full, FIRST TIME IN 2 YRS NERO SAID HE CANNOT FINISH THE FOOD CAUSE OF THE XTRA CUT THAT HE REGRETTED, we went to Daiso. Because i was looking for this charcoal mask that they are selling. I always use the charcoal mask there cause it's cheap and it works like magic. All my blackheads and whiteheads all gone with that and it's only $2. I bought 5 bottles the last time and it's finished now. I needed to get new bottles of them but i went to Vivo outlet and it was out of stock. Went to Orchard's earlier on also out of stock. I damn sad and stress now cause i can feel the heads gonna come out soon. It was the last squeeze of my bottle today that i put on, what am i supposed to put on my face next week????? Gotta find it soon man.  Its part of my life already. I think i'm gonna buy like 10 bottles of it when i find it. Freaking hard to find cause it's always out of stock.

Anyway, i've also been eating good foods. But mainly these 2 foods.

Preserved vegs with Minced pork. The one at Vivo is gooooood~~~

Damn tasty!! Spam chill even nicer. And usually mum would buy herbal chicken with it.

So i usually took the soup and eat with this, heavenly. I don't usually eat chinese foods a lot but this.

EXCEPTION. 

Salmon sashimi. hahahahha i always eat this so it's not surprising.

But if i order delivery like this, i don't just eat them raw. I usually cook miso soup with it.

Then dip these fishes to my soup and let it cook there. YUM IN A BOWL.

And if I'm really hungry, put rice inside the bowl of soup. GOODNESS!

SO. I was supposed to be asleep i was saying. I was asleep earlier on. But i woke up.

For business. Too tired and i really couldn't do everything by tonight and through the night, 

so i've postponed the date to +1 more day than the scheduled today at 6pm.

It was a good decision. NO REGRETS.

And i found this on Tumblr few days back. It's true.

Gonna tumblr again and sleep. Or maybe i shouldn't.... Cause my dearest boy is gonna travel to HK tmr with his family until next tuesday and since he's gonna be up early later at probably 6/7am, i should probably wait and stay up?? I'll see how. 

BYEEEEEE~~~~~~~

OH, And 15th. TODAY WAS OUR 2YRS2MONTHS TGT. 

TIME REALLY PASS VERYYYYYYYY FAST.

IT'S BEEN ENJOYABLE. I LOVE EVERY MOMENT OF IT.

BUT I ESPECIALLY LOVE THE PART WHERE WE OVERCOME SOMETHING AND THEN WE MADE UP IN A FEW HOURS' TIME. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, NO MATTER HOW JIALAT THE QUARELLS WERE, WE NEVER GAVE UP ON EACH OTHER.

THAT IS IMPORTANT FOR ME. LOVE IS GOOD. IRREPLEACABLE.

AND MORE TO COMEEEEE~~~~

Talk about that, i aLWAYS love it when Nero suddenly talk about kids and such.

Fast and irrational for others in their pov for talking about that. But i'm pretty sure talking about that cause no harm. It's not like we didn't think it through and get married and have babies right now when our finances are nowhere good lol. Taking it slowwww~~~ and steady.

just some random thought tonight

Looking back, I find myself miserably misunderstood by people. But it's alright aye, it's all good now.
They said you don't need a certain number of friends, you only need a number of certain friends. Yes?

Actually tbh, it's not that i am anti-social and such. I just don't like the feeling of being fake. Like why would you be nice to someone you do not like? Sure you can laugh here and there with them but that's all fake.... what's the point? I really can't be bothered with people I'm not close to. They say it's an immature act but i'd rather be labelled as immature than a two-faced bitch. If i can't even stand someone who's two-faced, why would I be one myself?

"Don't do unto others what you don't want others to do unto you" - Confucius

Which is why eg. in class, I'd rather talk to people i'm just close to. Actually, it's not that hard to know that i don't like someone. If they're in a group with me and i don't talk to them / talk less to them about their personal life but mostly and/or entirely on the problem topic itself, then it's just quite obvious i am not interested. But y'know, you will know that you're close to me when i'm damn talkative around you.. and crazy and open. Actually, i'm really damn fucking happy with the choices i made. We see everyone graduated, but who's the one who still stick with me? That's the people I treasure. If i am still even talking to you after graduation, then you already mean something to me. Otherwise, I honestly can't remember 3/4 of the class names already. SWEAR. Even Nero sometimes get fed up cause he's talking about this person and i'm like who is that.

But that's one part of me when i do not like others la. I do like other people, but its' time.
I know they say make time for people who you love. I absolutely understood it.
But I really just can't. Even if i am able to meet people. i need to have like a few days notice before it.

Because of my work. People think that when i'm done with one work, i can have rest. BUT NO.
I just ended one preorder. I have not listed and collate their orders (max. 1 hour) , i have not placed their orders (max. 4-5 hours), I have not done QC and pack parcels for the last preorder items that came (max. one fucking day and another half day YA I'M NOT EXAGGERATING), I have not mailed out their parcels that i just packed (max. half an hour), I wanna open new preorder within 2 days' time, I have not found the new items arrivals (half a day), I have not edited all the pictures that's to be released for the next preorder (another half a day).... and more la. That's just the main few parts.
It's also frustrating to me sometimes cause i am worried for my eyesight AND I CAN'T WATCH MY DRAMA THE DAY IT WAS RELEASED. Upsetting.

K but above all of this, there are really a lot of things i wanna do and spend my time on. I've always wanted to daobao foods for Nero during lunch time y'know that bf sometimes joke about "you know a good wife will bring lunch for the husband one", although it was only a joke but i really want to do it. But how can i, when every time i slept after 3am-4am (the time i finished all my work) and then only woke up at 12-1pm. After lunch already right? Feel damn bummed. Then another, i need to pass my bro his girlfriend stuffs and i really want to pass him fast but how you tell me how. Everytime i want to do that, it's either i have not sleep the night before or i have too many things to do the next day. Then, I also want to meet the usuals. but i'm actually thankful we can still meet on weekend. Also, I want to meet my bf's mehmehs friends, it's been really long since i last spent time with them. BUT HOW U TELL ME HOW.

Haiya but that is also another reason why the time i managed to spend with people are the ones i treasure la. Cause it's really taking up most of my time. Then dumb people will ask me why you don't want to take a break first then continue. You so smart you try to take a break and once you rest, where will you have the motivation and determination again to start? Will confirm make you damn sian to start it again. So knowing myself cause i damn lazy and freaking good at procastination, i rather not take the risk and just work and work and work.

Dk how my random thought become compo la but hahahaha if you managed to read everything, you da real mvp. goodnight.

Lost

Lost weight la. Was crazily dieting like shit + exercising with my gym bicycle but.  I think I gained back the weight I loss cause I have been eating good foods. 

Especially with my family. But no la no la, I think not so jialat. Still got more of the loss than the gain back. EH even my bf say my chin is back got a bit pointed already not like FISHBALL. 

Really AH. Talk about Nero. We are already in the state of the relationship where we can just tell each other you look like shit today honest words. Or sibeh romantic sometimes say handsome. But the first time when I told Nero "you also not handsome actually". He gives me the gasp face and said "WAH wah Wah. So now we in this stage already AH" HAHAHAHAHAH got me laughing till now. REAl funny. 

Anyway. After like dk how many months of not eating at GBTB already, (the last time was with the usuals), my parents finally suggested to go there and eat my STINGray. Actually it's not that they want to eat there. It's because mummy kept bugging daddy to go there with her and take pic with the gigantic baby status there. So food was just my bait and I became their tour guide and photographer. But anyhoooo, we get to spend time together and so its all worth t for me la. Use me more also never mind. For my family I will.

YA 2 stingrays from 2 different stores. Cause I have to at least have 2 of those in one meal. Nice lehhhhh~~~ I intern that time with my colleagues all eat this. Especially with sokshien my stingray  partner. Then sinhar and the rest of my kids are just "HAIYO-you-all-eat-this-again-ok-la-eat-w-you GAHAHA cute. Good memories, gold memories. 

Kk then. On Friday and today. For dinner. We had this ZI char foods under our block. It's like a weekly thing for me and my family. SHIOK ok. I dk what's the name in English but just know it's good. I'm gonna bring Nero here one fine day and make him addicted to it. Hehe. 

And todayyyyyy. WAH. Had ramen. My cravings for ramen is like since dk when j told Nero. He finally bring me go eat that today imagine my happiness. Somemore I was damn hungry. Satisfying oishiiiiii nehhh~~~~~

 we were everywhere today of singapore anyway. And I got to see my Angeline baby!! Didn't saw her la cause Nero was beside me. But when I saw her, I was damn shocked but soooo happy that I hugged her. See. Fate is funny sometimes. 

And I took a lot of pics with Nero today cause the train was damn empty make funny SIAO faces also can but then!!!! The more acceptable ones is in NERO'S phones. So it's okay I shall upload none of it.

Ok very good night. I shall tumblr a bit before sleeping. HEHEHEHEHEHEHE. 

And also wait for this bf to stop playing the game he just bought earlier on and sleep. Got work like no work like that AH. 

And the game. He bring me go to one end of the Far East shopping mall but it was out of stock and bring me to another end of Far East plaza AND THE SALESPERSON SAID IT WAS SOLD OUT. BUT THIS BF OF MINE KE GIANG LOOK THROUGH IT AND GUESS WHAT. HE FOUND THE LAST PIECE OF THE GAME HE WANTS. Then the salesperson said "oh you found the last piece of it?" And started explaining the previous customer all those and how they nv buy all. BUT MAIN POINT IS. HE FOUND THE GAME SO EVERYTHING THE GUY SAY IS JUST ONE EAR GO IN ANOTHER GO OUT and I'm too tired from walking already and I'm just like HAHAHAHAHA I DONT CARE WHAT URE TALKING ABOUT IM LOOKING AT MY BF EXPRESSION NOW. AS IF HE JUST WON MY HEART BUT STILL V SHY THOSE KIND". AFTER HE PAID. HE WALKED OUT OF THE STORE W THE SMILE. NOT LOOK AT ME AND SMILE YKNOW. IS LOOK AT THE GAME AND SMILE TO HIMSELF. But luckily, I am very demure and understanding ah so I see him happy I also happy. And also feeling lucky cause my BF will stop his game for me and even if he play he will think of me. Plus point AH. Happy gerrrrr is me ~~~~~ 

Night thoughts

ITonight,

It feels magical. Not as if something magical or anything good happen but in a way where my thoughts are magical. 

I know Nero and I will be TRavelling to Batam and I think it's quite obvious how excited and ecstatic I am every single day. Really can't wait for it. But YKNOW, girls...... Dreams. Includes me too also okay! I really imagine every single thing, the things we'll talk about, the emotions we'll be feeling. And I'm not even going to lie or cover about Any of my excitement. And it actually gets me worked up for some reason.... To actually think that he is going to be my favorite travel companion and it's going to make me even more excited for this thing called TRAVELLING. It actually feels really weird because I always find travelling a burden. From the packing, to the journey.... It's all tiring. But this is actually the 2nd time I'm feeling like this and even more excited. (The first time is with the USUALS to Batam as well) and it overpowers the tiredness. That, is magical enough for me. For someone sooooo lazy like me who only bothers to go Out when I'm really close to Someone / desperately need something. Dismissing the thoughts of tiredness is magical enough. 

Enough of magical. I believe that as long as we are together, We can look for a better tomorrow for the best of our worlds. Although there might be arguments sometimes, I am thankful enough we never give up on each other but instead compromise / find a way to solve it. 

I need a person like that. Someone who wouldn't give up on me. I'm nothing but thankful for everything of Nero and everything we've shared. The good times and the bad. I can say I am the happiest girl in the world. The world is big, and so is the love. Blessed for every moment I look back on, Gonna be even more blessed for the times to come. 

Note to self as well. 

And found this through tumblr I thought it was very sweet. Either I can feel the happiness or I'm just probably thinking too much again. Doesn't matter either way. 

... I am hungry. But goodnight. 

Fzhxcmcjf

I just REalised, that my song preferences differ during the day and night. Actually no lah, I think during the day mix here mix there Korean, English, Chinese songs all can. But during the night. I always Always listen to CHINESE songs. Hate the sound of English and Korean. Weirddddddddddd rightttt~~~. 

But I just thought that CHINESE songs evoke more feelings than any other songs and they give me the calm feelings . Which is good. Dk why and how but I just love how the feelings of such are more expressed. 

Aiya idk what I talking also la. 

Anyway today is really a busy busy day. Literally spent the whole day doing business. Sleepy also I Tahan. Winner already.